From Awareness Grows Success

Hello, all! Even though I have still not been studying like normal (thanks extra college applications!), I have gained some valuable insight about things I should consider when studying. For a long time, I used K-pop as a means to practice what I had learned in a fun, easy-to-track manner. I would translate song lyrics into a little notebook and sing along in the car. And I felt happy that I was remembering and learning in this way. But it has come to my attention recently that a lot of people have been hurt by the thing I held so dear.

I had not really explored the more toxic side of globalization of K-pop and how it can affect Asian Americans. I had a talk with someone I hold quite dear recently who educated me on how they had deeply troubling experiences with racism due to that expectation to be a perfect, model Asian like you see on album covers and social media. And it hurt them seeing how people could enjoy it and act like there was nothing wrong with the lofty expectations (largely from young women)  that are heaped upon Asians. It felt to them that it sort of spread an Asian fetishization in the West more prevalent than it had been before, and that saddened me. I did not want to be associated with something that could be so harmful and full of hate.

I do understand the positive aspects of modern Korean music. In a way, it gets culture "out there," and people can and do take pride in that cultural representation. And when it is enjoyed through cultural appreciation, I believe it can even be good. But oftentimes, fans and the industry titans take it too far, and it is difficult for me to enjoy or study with such a tool anymore after seeing that other side.

But this has also spurred growth in myself and my studies. I have been educated on something I was completely in the dark about, and for that I am grateful. Instead of music, I began relying on podcasts when I drive, and I appreciate this habit much more than passively listening to music. With podcasts like Talk To Me In Korean, I learn words, patterns, and concepts and actively feel like I am learning and retaining something important on my commutes to school and other activities. That is a success. And when I am at home with time (and much-needed energy), I can dedicate myself to book-studying much easier. I do not get tied up in how much easier or more fun music is and can truly focus on the work in front of me. 

In other successful news, I have been included by a teacher in a group of kids who will be taking a biliteracy test in the Spring. I am nowhere close to fluent currently, but that deadline keeps my head in the game. When I did not have a solid test date, I grew more lackadaisical in my studies and could not get back on track well at all. Seeing that test date and knowing I have the opportunity to gain college credit and a seal of biliteracy excites (and scares) me into learning at a much more rapid pace. And I like it like that.

That teacher also mentioned that she has some Korean contacts who may be able to assist me in my studies, and I am anxiously awaiting a solid answer on this front. In fact, I will follow up about this today! Hopefully, this will be yet another success story. I am beginning to reach out more and more and have more opportunities for learning, and I am so grateful for everyone who has taken part--even a small part--on this journey with me.